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01/09/2004 Entry: "Suck on this"

So there are vampires all over New York. No kidding, I've run into vampires on four seperate occasions recently. The First one is the funniest so I will leave it for last. The second time was at my office's christmas party. The tutors for one of the other programs were all sitting at the party. Nothing unusual about the group. Mostly young latin tutors. There was one however that was a little out of the ordinary.. He looked like an extra that stole from the set of "battlefield Earth" and then "blade" before coming to the soire. He was a heavy set bearded latino male, six feet tall wearing a long, very festive black leather coat. His half blond dreads went down to his waist and he was pierced in at least three places that I could see. Now this is nothing unusual, not even for a high school tutor. What made him stick out in my mind was the conversation he was having with one of my coworkers as I was on my way to the bathroom. He was telling him about the vampire society he was a part of and how great it was. Now because anyone could be mistaken in what they hear and because I had six or seven cups of coke by that time, I didn't stop and stare. But I did when I got back from bathroom and thats when I noticed he had fangs. Not the plastic kind, or the wax lip kind but the expensive bonded to your teeth kind. The kind that cost a few thousand bucks. The kind you can't just take off before a job interview or an office christmas party. I didn't say anything to him. I just thought what an odd coincidence it was that just the day before I had had such a similar experience, but I'll get to that later.
The third and fourth we're in the same day in the east village. Not that unusual but the one guy was pushing a baby carriage and talking to his friend when I saw the fangs. The same expensive kind. Then, not two minutes later. There was a group of punky Goth kids in front of the McDonalds by St. Marks. You know the ones. There was one who was the spitting image of the evolved cat from red dwarf. He was laughing with his head tilted back all evil mastermind like. Pearly whites canines sticking down like a half inch more than normal. I pointed it out to Jeannie who I had already told about both of the other runins. She saw the fangs and thought how odd it was that she had never noticed how many vampires were running around NYC. The best time and the funniest was the one that happened four of five days prior. I was on a crowded rush hour 5 train going home from work. The doors open up and two mean looking guys with long black hair, visible tatoos and lots of manmade entryies into their skin, walk on to the train. I was standing next to them so I could see all of the detail in the chain mail shirt one guy was wearing. No joking, chainmail. They were both decked out in long black trenches and around their necks were metal chains holding big triangular pendants that had barbs clawing the chests of these two. Maybe they were the markers for the society they were members of, maybe they just wanted to look cool. Their fangs were very noticable even though they had them placed on different teeth. You could see that people were a little afraid of them as they had a space buffer around them. Kind of like the ones that homeless people get regardless of how crowded the train is. Fangs menacing those around them with every word. The thing was that since I was right next to them I could hear every word they said. This is how their conversation went. Scary vampire #1: "So you know tomorrow is the day the new Yugioh cards come out." Scary Vamp 2: "yeah I can't wait." This was followed by more specific talk about Yugioh cards. I couldn't pay attention at this point because I was trying so very hard not to laugh out loud at how foolish appearances really are, also so I wouldn't be eaten.